My friend, Trillia Newbell, wrote a piece for her online magazine titled "Dear Pastor: From a Black Female Congregant." Here’s an excerpt to introduce the topic:
I grew up being told that I have to work triple as hard because I am black and then triple that because I am female. So, that’s what I did. I grew up wanting to be Oprah . . . but “better.” Because of the socio-economic position of many blacks, this need to be driven is ingrained in us. And if we have opportunities like I did, we best take advantage of them. Many of the black females I ran with in college went on to be doctors, lawyers, etc. I was looked down upon by a research professor when I expressed my desire to stop grad school and do the internship with my church college ministry, Volunteers For Christ. See, I was forfeiting all that the civil rights leaders had worked so hard for me to be able to do—I had gotten into law school and wasn’t going to go.
I highly recommend that you read all of "Dear Pastor" on Trillia's webzine, especially her gracious conclusion.