38 comments

Lina Abujamra

Not Your Typical Christian Woman

Posted on 06.01.12 by Lina Abujamra | Twitter: @LinaMay

I am not your typical Christian woman.

I was born in Beirut, Lebanon, in a traditional family where the father brought home the bacon and the mother, despite being highly educated and well spoken, became the expert in all things pertaining to home and children.

Every evening at 5 o’clock, my parents sipped Turkish coffee on the balcony of our apartment and discussed life and family and future. Even without the impact of Christian radio and modern day blogs, I quickly figured out what it meant to be in a relationship of equal yet differing roles. I don’t remember ever getting a Sunday school lesson on what a typical Christian woman looks like, but I had it modeled clearly in my home in West Beirut in the middle of the 70s.

Then over the years, I evidently failed to read the memo informing me that girls grow up to become wives, and missed that train by a mile. My father, a traditional Lebanese man, understood that education was the key to freedom and a Green Card, and pushed us to become all we could be in this world.

So instead of planning a wedding, I planned a career in medicine.

One day I woke up and noticed that I had turned into a forty-year-old single pediatric ER doctor in the fourth largest city in the United States, and was maintaining a well read daily blog about biblical living.

No. I am not your typical Christian woman.

Two years ago, I took a job as the women’s ministry director at my church. It is a job that demands my time and attention, and a whole lot of prayer. The church I belong to, I suppose, is a more conservative church. I don’t sit on the leadership team, and I don’t preach on Sundays.

Some in our modern-day culture have accused my kind of church of not giving women their rightful voice and place in leadership. They complain that the church must catch up with the times, and that gender equality is lacking in the church.

When I first came across those vehemently strong female opinions, it infuriated me. Then I was a little bit confused. Do I get an adequate voice in the church? Am I treated fairly? The more time I spent worrying about my role in the church, the less time I gave to actually caring for the flock God had put under my care.

Then I made a discovery: that even though I can run an ER with my eyes closed, I have no desire to be in charge; and that even though I’m single at forty, I would love a man by my side if God would so graciously provide; that even though the world tells me I’m just as strong as a man, I would do anything to have a guy by my side on grocery days.

I am tired of letting the world—even one that proclaims to be Christian—dictate who I am and what I must be. There is only one source of truth to define what a Christian woman is. That truth is in God’s Word.

In His Word, Christ dictates my identity. He reveals my need. He teaches me patience and dependence and submission when I don’t feel I’m getting what I want when I want it and when I’m waiting for Him to reveal His will in His time and in His way.

I may not be your typical Christian woman, but I know who I am. I am a Bible-believing, Christ-following Christian woman, and I refuse to accept anything less than His Word and His best in my life.

I’d love to get to know you. Are you a “typical Christian woman”? Why or why not? 

Comments

  1. I am an ordinary Christian woman. Married at 19 and "planned" to have children after both of us finished our education. Four months later we were pregnant. I became a stay-at-home mother to three daughters who are now stay-at-home mothers to our eleven grandchildren. Sometimes I feel as if I did little in my life, but God tells me differently, He says the opposite of our what the culture speaks. I love Typical Christian Women, especially the aged ones. Love you, Sister!
    http://laughingatwinter.blogspot.com/
    posted by Julie
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 7:36 am
  2. Amen, I don't think there is a "typical Christian women" If we are in the will of God, then I think we are free to be what He wants us to be. And yes, we must submit ourselves to His Word and the God ordain authorities He has placed in our lives.
    His will is that we be saved, sanctified, spirit lead and filled and submissive.
    posted by Elveria
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:02 am
  3. I may not be your typical Christian woman, but I know who I am. I am a Bible-believing, Christ-following Christian woman, and I refuse to accept anything less than His Word and His best in my life.


    I just had to copy this last phrase.
    I am not a typical Christian woman. Everyday, is not a easy task, nor did the Lord say that it would be. BUT His Mercies are new every morning. Thank you for reminding us all--- That our Footsteps are ordered and directed. I am encouraged this morning. I do not have to wonder what path that I am on... I just have to submit to the word and trust and lean on Him. No longer a misfit, but a fit with the Lord God Almighty.
    Thank you for your point of view.
    posted by Helen
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:15 am
  4. Love this post! Definitely getting an RT!

    Speaking the Truth, Dr. Lina!
    www.authorcynthiaherron.com
    posted by Cynthia Herron
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:18 am
  5. I was a career woman. My Gracious God saved me and allowed me to marry a man that allowed me to be a keeper at home. I have had the privilege of being a stay at home Mom for the last 20 years. There is no greater joy or privilege than obedience to the word of God, Titus 2
    http://titus2eight.blogspot.com/2012/05/femininity-biblical-prespective.html
    posted by Paige
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:24 am
  6. Dr.L Wow! :) such an inspiration.! I love it I am not ur typical Christian woman . Thank-you for ur hard work Gina
    posted by Gina
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:30 am
  7. Beautiful post, just beautiful.
    posted by Missy
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 10:12 am
  8. First great job Lena! Thank you for sharing and praise the Lord for what He has done and is doing in your life.

    Hmmm…”typical Christian woman.” Well if a single, motorcycle riding, do-it yourself home improvements, scientist that loves the Lord, then yes! LOL No, I do not think that I meet a typical anything and have others unsolicitedly tell me!

    I do appreciate and understand the struggle with women’s role in the church and how do I fit in. Recently (and still learning) my focus is turning to this: God does not make any mistakes, this includes the gifts of teaching and leadership He has given me. He has turned my heart to asking for and trusting that He will provide opportunities to use these gifts for His honor and glory.

    Walking with a limp,
    Cindy
    posted by Cindy Shannon
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 10:18 am
  9. I think I am typical in that I am insecure and have a hard time believing all that God says I am. I desire to be more confident in His love and grace. I would like to let go of my dependency on the world and it's rules and regulations, especially conning my waist line.

    Thank you for this beautiful post
    Www.heartreflections.wordpress.com
    posted by Shane
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 10:37 am
  10. Amen, sister!
    posted by Laura
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 10:47 am
  11. No, you are not typical, but you have done a wonderful job of using the gifts God has given you!! Still praying for God to grant you fulfillment in your desire to have a man by your side!!! Hugs!!
    posted by Laurie
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 11:21 am
  12. I am not a "typical" Christian woman either. I am a Seasoned Solo Godly Christian Woman! I am 45 years old, never married, no kids. The 2 biggest lesson I have learned is that life does not always work out the way "I" think or want it to and that I am made in the image of a loving, caring, gracious God & I am lovable!! My deepest desire is to be a wife & Mom & that just has not happened. I struggle financially & I struggle emotionally, a lot due to insecurities I have had in the past about my self image & self worth! But I have learned through much love & counseling that even though I make a lot of mistakes, I am loved! I am now back in college & getting my Associates degree. God is so faithful & so good!
    http://victorianroseofsharon.blogspot.com
    posted by Jacque
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 11:25 am
  13. Thankful for this post :-)
    I suspect there is no such thing as a 'typical Christian woman'... Just many of us think 'she' exists somewhere... But whoever 'she' is probably looks at someone else and thinks the same about them.
    Thanks for owning the life, gifts and experiences god has given you to be ur unique fingerprint of his glory. A great encouragement.
    thankfulzawadi.wordpress.com
    posted by jane
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 11:33 am
  14. Well said, Lina! It has been a while since undergrad, and I am thankful to see God's grace in your life as you seek to follow Him. Both of us have probably grown MUCH spiritually since those college days. I know I have. It's exciting to see you having an active role in this wonderful ministry.
    Any of us who have signed the True Woman Manifesto are not the typical Christian woman, or at least we shouldn't be. Swimming upstream in this culture is hard, and ministries like this one are so very important!
    posted by Josiah Edwards
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 11:41 am
  15. I love this post so much! If I could hug it I would--and you! I so struggle with the idea or mentality that there is "typical" Christian woman, as in there is specific mold that we should all fit into. We are all fearfully and wonderfully made uniquely! We are not cookie cutter. Our personalities are different, why would we expect our lives to be the same? Our God is creative! Look at creastion. It is so vast and multi-faceted--and we are the crowning jewels! Where I struggle is that there seems to be almsot a drive for everyone to be the same. My husband and I were married when I was 23 and he was 25, after we were both out of school. Whereas our friends were married very young, making us feel old! At 23! Insane, right? We prayfully sought God's timing on everything from when we should get engaged to when we should get married. Anytime we tried to make a move on our own understanding, it just did not work. We had children early and while I do stay home, it was not because it was my desire from childhood. No, I got a degree! I was going to have a career! It was God's desire and my desire to honor Him was greater than my desire to work. He has really blessed that.

    My marriage does not look just like our friends' Christian marriages or anyone else's, but the desire to honor God is still present. My husband is the head of our home and I submit to his headship, but the dynamics are different because our personalities are different from other married couples. The way I interact with my son looks different from the way other Christian mothers interact with their children, but I am still bringing him up to love the Lord.

    With all of my rambling, I am trying to say that a "typical" Christian woman should be one that has a heart for God and seeks out His will for her life. She should be a light for Christ in whatever she has been called to do, whether that is to be at home, at work, or on the mission field. Married or single, children or no children. It is so easy to stumble and get caught up in the idea of having to appear a certain way that it does take the focus off of serving Him.
    posted by Laura
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 12:10 pm
  16. Thank you. In some ways I am typical -- married, got a degree in nursing, two kids, worked part time for several years while they were toddlers. But then we moved. For the last several years I haven't worked as a nurse and don't want to. I feel a pull towards ministry, but don't know exactly where. Right now I am led to stay at home and home school my daughters, ministering to their friends and our neighbors.
    It seems too small of ministry and it's hard to give up the nursing license, which I will if I don't return in the next year. But these are the doors God has opened. And I am encouraged to hear how you chose ministry over your education. Thank you.
    posted by Sherry
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 12:13 pm
  17. I love this blog. Yes we knowwho we are in Christ. Thank God for our identity. What we do, we do to honor Him and spread the message. Keep doing What you are doing. God isin control and knows which direction to lead you in. Follow the path
    posted by Milo
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 12:15 pm
  18. I too am an ordinary Christian Women, and serve in the same capacity at the same bible believing church - but in Canada. Interesting how many women friends are more concerned about my 'not having a voice' or women's equality than I. I chose to stand on what God's Word says and fulfill my role as the Director of these precious ladies! Called to come along side, mentor, teach, create disciples and pray for and love these women with all I have.... in His strength. The world will not dictate how I serve my LORD and His flock of ladies. My ear is attentive to Him and knowing my role through His living WORD. I have a career, amazing husband, 2 incredible young adult children, new daughter in law and precious Grand-baby girl (Zoey)... and Director of Women's Ministry. I cherish every role the LORD has equipped me to do. Joshua 1:9 - He has truly been with me, my strength. Matthew 28:20 - and He has been there.
    Lina - you are an amazing mentor and example. THANK YOU for being real.
    posted by Jeannette
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 12:23 pm
  19. Even though I am a RN, I chose to be a stay-at-home wife and mom for many years. I faced criticism (as did my former husband), and little support or encouragement. What I saw as the greatest blessing, calling, and job a woman could do... raise a child, the world saw as 'insignificant' to commit to it full-time. There were a few short periods of times I did gain part-time employment outside of my home, because I wanted to 'feel' normal, and have a break from home-making. But overall, I was convicted that my place was at home. (This is in no way, me saying mothers that choose to work outside of the home are wrong. God places different callings on His daughters. This is just my story.)

    My sons are grown and living their own lives... as they should. I am very grateful and proud to be their mom. I have no regrets in the choice I made to be a 'domestic engineer' as my sister stated one time. ;-) And now, God has put on my heart a new purpose and calling (women's health & ministry) in this second season of my life. And I am equally committed to live out His will, His way, and in His timing.

    I too, did not 'fit' the image our society decided was 'normal'. But I also have learned, it is not society I want to please... it is my heavenly Father, my Almighty God. I am humbled with gratitude to serve Him -- however and wherever He calls me.

    Thank you, Lina, for being the lovely and authentic woman God called you to be.

    Blessings!
    posted by Joyce Gortz
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 1:01 pm
  20. This is a wonderful post, and strongly Word driven. Thanks Lina! My name is Luma and I'm Iraqi. Praise God that he brings his "daughters from the end of the earth." Isaiah 43:6-7
    www.gospelgrace.net
    posted by Luma Simms
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 1:32 pm
  21. One of the definitions of "typical" is "conforming to a particular type."

    The culture would like us all to conform. We are instructed about what is "in," and how we should look, think, and act. But in God's design there is great individuality. There is no "typical" woman, because we are all created with different gifts, physical traits, personalities, etc., and we have different goals and experiences.

    Within the biblical parameters of our gender and callings (married/single, in particular), we still have great opportunities to express our individuality. I've grown to love the "untypical women" in the faith ... like Nancy Leigh DeMoss ... who are not afraid to move counter to the culture in their choice to follow hard after God. "Christ dictates my identity" ~ I love that, Lina!
    heartchoicestoday.blogspot.com
    posted by Dawn Wilson
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 2:00 pm
  22. Thank you for sharing your heart, Lina. You've challenged me personally in our friendship to continue giving to God every part of our lives, whether they look typical or not. I may look typical in the Christian sub-culture of the United States (stay-at-home mom with 5 children), but having recently moved to Toronto, I realize there's absolutely nothing typical about a family of our size! Nor is it typical here in this liberal Canadian city to be a believing Christian.

    But trying to be "typical" feels ultimately fear-oriented. I think it requires courage to let God move us beyond the norms to which we must supposedly conform, and I thank you for giving voice to that calling!
    www.findingmypulse.com
    posted by Jen
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 3:55 pm
  23. Lina, thank you for your post! I am not either. I am nearing 40, single and loving the life the Lord has blessed me with. I have a job I really enjoy in corporate America, working in Sales for one of the top-ranked companies in the country. I am actively involved in my church, neighborhood outreach and women's ministry. Until recently, I really thought perhaps the Lord would have me to stay single so I could serve Him that way. I was willing if that is His choice. However, awhile ago He brought a godly man into my life and now I am stepping out onto a new path very soon. It's not without some fear but also looking forward to what He has in store. I am writing because I LOVE hearing your convictions on biblical womanhood and how you are living your life to the full, waiting on the Lord for a mate should He give you one. You go, girl! I am so glad I have tried to make the most of my single years for the Lord, as I know that it will help me have that mindset when I am married. Eternity's too long, time is too short, to do it any other way. Wish we could have coffee together - I think we'd enjoy each other's company! Love in Him,
    posted by Jenn
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 4:34 pm
  24. Lina - loved your article! Is there such a thing as "typical?" I am learning more and more that if we are doing what God wants US to do - that's what should be "typical" for us. It is so easy to compare and think that what we are doing, or how we are doing it (career, marriage, kids, etc.) is not as good as, or not just like someone else. But what God has on our plate, is not what he has for everyone. Contentment in our present circumstances is a lesson to be learned daily - at least for me!
    posted by Kristen Golson
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 5:09 pm
  25. Great reminder, that we are all created in HIS image and we are wonderfully made & we are unique- for HIS Glory... GREAT POST DR. LINA
    posted by Telma Landhorian
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 6:06 pm
  26. Love your post as always- you are so encouraging and I have shared your posts and blogs with ladies in my office, they now come to me to share your posts.
    posted by Terri
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 6:17 pm
  27. Great insight and great reminder to keep Gods Word as our guide.
    posted by Nellie
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 6:24 pm
  28. I'm not a typical Christian woman either, but that's okay. God has me on this crazy, adventurous life with Him, and it's been a blast. I enjoy your blog very much, Lina, and was excited to see your story here on True Woman. :)
    www.twitter.com/ellesbee
    posted by Lindsay
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 7:15 pm
  29. Lina, thank you for sharing a window into your early family life and the importance of how it helped form you into the loving Christian woman that you are. I admire the fact that you had an upbringing filled with strong values surrounded by an undenying faith in Christ. I am 48 years old, and am thankful for God's timing in bringing me to a church that blesses me with the opportunity to be part of a flock that is tended by Godly woman such as yourslef. I was blinded by not knowing what it truly meant to submit myself as a woman; today, I wouldn't have it anyother way.
    posted by Laura
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 9:30 pm
  30. Lina, we LOVE it that you are not "typical" with anything in your life!! That's what is so beautiful about you! How amazing that God would use your intelligent mind to be a Doctor and then use that same intelligence to be able to expound the word of the Lord the way that you do!! Thanks again for being honest and vulnerable.

    I'm thankful for your Godly upbringing and for your parents! And, I'm thankful that you're NOT typical.....because that's what makes you so much FUN!!
    posted by Dannel Gruber
    on Friday, June 1, 2012 at 11:57 pm
  31. Hi Lina,
    Loved your post. I know what it is to watch the parents sip tea at evening times, wake up to see Father reading news papers, home cooked meals from mother and then in the next generation missing the train by a mile.
    I was born and raised in India. Just like you, planned a career and became a Physical Therapist. God intervened at some point and brought a godly life partner into my life. I am married now with kids. Therapist turned stay at home homeschooling mom. Thanks to the mercies of God and ROH.
    Glad to know you and what God is doing in your life.
    I don't know if I'm typical or not. You can conclude that. But I'm striving to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.
    diariesofasojourner.blogspot.com
    posted by Raichel Cherian
    on Saturday, June 2, 2012 at 1:04 am
  32. Thank you Lina for sharing. I too am not of the cookie cutter mold. Nor do I "fit" into main stream culture. Some would think I am not a typical Christian woman either. And perhaps not according to "looks". I am a mid 50's, black garbed biker with a number of tattoos and a "look" of attitude. What my friends in and out of church see is a woman who loves Jesus, struggles sometimes, but is friendly and helpful. Yes, I have a "story". Just like so many other women out there. I share in my husband's ministry in our world. And I have a daily devotional that I send out. My heart is for the broken woman. I love that you are not typical. I embrace the fact that I am not typical. We can't be if we are to minister in our worlds and help bridge some gaps. God created each and everyone of us to be beautifully unique - just like snowflakes. I rejoice and praise him for that.
    posted by jo
    on Saturday, June 2, 2012 at 8:54 am
  33. Wow. I absolutely love this post. You got my mind going in all types of directions (in a positive way). Thank you for the words of encouragement.

    Sincerely,

    Tani, "I may not be your typical Christian woman, but I know who I am. I am a Bible-believing, Christ-following Christian woman, and I refuse to accept anything less than His Word and His best in my life."
    www.asktani.com
    posted by Tani
    on Saturday, June 2, 2012 at 11:44 pm
  34. Hi Lina,

    Thank you for taking the time to share with us! I enjoyed "meeting" you and hearing your testimony (loved hearing about your childhood in Lebanon and your parents).

    I remember you from your blogging for one of the last True Woman conferences. I was impressed with your amazing gift for thoroughness, perception, speed and accuracy as you blogged about the conference messages. I thought you were about college age and thought, "Who is this young girl, who writes like a professional?" Now, to find out you are a medical doctor, is no surprise to me. Makes me think of Dr. Luke (the gospel writer) with his gift for detail, thoroughness and accuracy.

    It is inspiring and a blessing to see someone who is vigorous in the things of the Lord, using her talents for God's glory; you are an example for me (though I am not nearly as educated and trained!). May the Lord continue to use you mightily, dear Lina, and keep in you that beautiful, humble, servant heart.

    With love and prayers for you and your family and for God's perfect will for you concering a godly husband!

    Leslie S.
    posted by Leslie S.
    on Monday, June 4, 2012 at 9:00 am
  35. I don't think there is one woman that we can look at and say, "oh, she's the typical Christian woman". In scripture we are introduced to a vastly different group of women, each of whom followed God's truth in whatever situation they lived. Would you consider Rahab a typical Christian woman? She had been a prostitute. How about Abigail? She was a faithful in an unhappy marriage. What about Mary and Martha? And the list goes on......

    Don't limit your definition to today's culture. Typical women of God have lived faithful lives before the Lord for centuries. I think our calling is to be faithful where we live, whether it is single or married, working outside the home or inside, with children or without.....

    Thanks for the blog post, and thanks for living faithfully where the Lord has planted you! ;-)
    posted by Melinda
    on Monday, June 4, 2012 at 9:33 am
  36. What is a typical Christian woman-you are right-it is only described in the pages of God's holy word. At 62, I am caring for an aging disabled mom, and still teaching math a bit. Raised in the church with a huge dose of religion I fled from it in college and spent 12 years on the other side. When the Lord saved me from all that-I unfortunately for a while brought my "feminism" with me. It's been an interesting struggle-but I now know that submission is not a dirty word-and the only safe place is in total submission to the Lord as a single woman-He is my husband. But the Lord has also provided that if a man is in total submission to the Lord-then a woman would find marriage to him-and submission-to be another safe place to be.
    Oh that the body of Christ in America could realize that seeking liberty and the pursuit of happiness can only actually happen as we completely understand our total dependence on God-when we surrender to Him and become "slaves" to Christ-then real liberty comes as we then are only responsible for what God meant us to be responsible-and He does all the rest. Then the power of the Holy Spirit is unleashed and we can be used of the Lord in mighty ways.
    posted by Marilyn Williams
    on Saturday, June 9, 2012 at 9:14 am
  37. Wonderful post. Thanks!
    posted by Gini Mincy
    on Monday, July 2, 2012 at 9:00 am
  38. I am a bible-believing woman of God. I believe I am God's Masterpiece created to give God glory by discovering and using my God-given gifts. I have a ministry called Wings of Love Women's Ministry - www.womendestinedforgreatness.wordpress.com and my desire is to teach other women to see themselves as God's Masterpiece. I have written a book entitled "You Are God's Masterpiece". Women who read this book will see themselves as God sees them, and never settle for less than God's best.
    www.womendestinedforgreatness.wordpress.com
    posted by Karmen A. Booker
    on Monday, October 1, 2012 at 7:10 pm

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