14 comments

Kimberly Wagner

Light in the Darkness

Posted on 12.22.09 by Kimberly Wagner | Twitter: @KimberlyWagner7
Topics: Homefront, With Your Kids

Broken sentences came in gasps interrupted by pain-filled sobs. My daughter’s sorrow, relayed from six hundred miles away, took me back to a familiar loss. “The doctor thinks . . . it looks like . . . the baby probably . . . died at six weeks.”

Rachel entered pregnancy glowing with expectancy. Bubbling with excitement, eleven weeks ago she phoned me within moments of reading her at-home pregnancy test. Her deepest longing is for children, and this would be her first.

The miscarriage came in the early morning hours the day after the doctor’s visit. A womb emptied its treasure far too early, a daughter delved into pain deeper than she’s ever known, and questions fill the empty spaces. But my heart returns to the known when facing questions which hold no easy answers:

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6).

We are not the first mother and daughter to grope through the dark gloom of anguish; to feel our way along the darkness. The people of Isaiah’s day were held captive, dwelling under the shadow of death. It seemed the Lord’s face was hidden, but when the Messianic prophecy was delivered it became the promise of light to those in the thickest night. This child foretold would dispel their darkness, for He is the Light of the World.

In my darkest moments, His name forms on my lips and darkness flees. He is my Wonderful Counselor when there are no easy answers. I am confident He knows best and all He does is good and right. He is my Mighty God and I can trust Him to shoulder my pain. Because He is the Everlasting Father, He has gone before me to know what each moment holds so I never enter uncharted territory, and I’m never alone. As the Prince of Peace, this Holy Child was hailed by the angels as the gift of peace, and He is my provision of peace.

Darkness, anguish, loss, sorrow, and pain are familiar attendants in a fallen world. Shattered dreams and barren wombs bid us to return to these solid truths as our reference point. And these are the truths we hand down to the next generation when firm ground begins to crumble. Focusing on the character of Christ becomes the North Star leading back to fixed and immovable foundations.

I encourage you to spend some time today reflecting on this Child who was born and will return to rule. How has He served as your Light in the darkness recently?  

 

 

Comments

  1. What a beautiful reminder of just who Jesus is. How wonderful to have such a Savior!
    http://www.offthebeatenpathministries.com/
    posted by Kay
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 12:12 pm
  2. Thank You, for sharing with us the tragic loss of your daughters baby. I too had suffered the same loss along with other painful losses and disappointments. There have been many times I have felt the darkness engulf me, and the waters swelling around me leaving me to wonder if they would take me under with them. When I have flown to the Lord in anguish the verses He has used to comfort me and lift me up onto my feet again are: Isa. 43:1&2 "...Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have called you by my name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you."

    Grace and peace,
    Kim
    posted by Kim
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 12:14 pm
  3. The Lord has shown to me many times that He is the light of the world. THe Lord knows how easily I can beome fearful. Each day He helps me relinquish them. But one particular church service, an Evangelist came and spoke words of comfort and healing. As people came forward, I had prayed to God to deliver me from this fear. I needed to know that God was with me and involved in this paralizing fear. I asked Him to have that Evangelist call me to come up for this healing. As the service continued, the evangelist called several people. The service was near the end and at that moment, the evangelist called me up. He told me God would not let him end this service without you being prayed for and told that God love me. I remember that day and return to that as often as I need to to remember that God called me to be prayed for, to be reminded that He loves me, and I am on the winning side with Jesus. There is nothing that can touch me without first going through Jesus' hand and that He will walk with me through any trial.
    posted by Andrea
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 12:16 pm
  4. Thank you for this message of hope in Christ in the midst of loss. I just found out 5 days ago my sister has been murdered. Your message was comforting as I seek the Lord and all that He is to make it through this.

    Loving and remembering my dearest sister and trusting God to be my everything.
    posted by Sherri
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 12:43 pm
  5. When my son's doctor told us that we had no more options, we had exhausted all possible treatments for leukemia, the darkness surrounded me. During the next two months we cared for our son as he gradually slipped away. I read my Bible but could hardly make sense of the words. It was faithful believers that stood with us and prayed with us that kept me steady. I needed to rest on their faith. It is good, Kimberly, that your daughter has your faith to encourage her!
    posted by Carol Van Der Woude
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 1:50 pm
  6. When my son's doctor told us that we had no more options, we had exhausted all possible treatments for leukemia, the darkness surrounded me. During the next two months we cared for our son as he gradually slipped away. I read my Bible but could hardly make sense of the words. It was faithful believers that stood with us and prayed with us that kept me steady. I needed to rest on their faith. It is good, Kimberly, that your daughter has your faith to encourage her!
    www.carolvanderwoude.com
    posted by Carol Van Der Woude
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 1:51 pm
  7. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith."

    I've returned to this verse numerous times in recent weeks. Without Christ there is no hope in anything, but with Him we can know hope that carries us through anything. We (our family) had an awesome reminder of his faithfulness today. Finances are strained, as they are for so many these days. There's been very little work and we are a family of 7 on one income. Challenging is putting it mildly sometimes. And yet, without a word to anyone but the Lord, He has met the need for the shortage that existed this month! Incredible! He is faithful in everything, without any help from us!
    posted by Jennifer
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 3:26 pm
  8. Thank you for so eloquently reminding us that hope is all wrapped up in Jesus.
    http://heartchoicestoday.blogspot.com
    posted by Dawn Wilson
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 3:45 pm
  9. Dearest Kim,
    My heart goes out to Rachel and to you. I know the anguish of miscarrying. May He comfort you both deeply and envelop you in His lovingkindness and tender mercy.
    Sherri, I am so sorry to hear of the so tragic loss of your sister. The pain must seem almost unbearable. I pray the Lord bears you up as the mother eagle spoken of in the Bible and that He comforts you also abundantly with His great love and compassion.
    Yes, Kim, the Lord is, and has always been (since I've been saved) my light in the darkness. How faithful He is; what a glorious Light. Praise the Lord that we have that Light to guide us and do not have to walk in darkness.
    Love and prayers,
    posted by Leslie S.
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 4:32 pm
  10. Thank you Leslie for your words of comfort. You are right the pain does seem unbearable. Thank you for your encouragement in the Lord.
    posted by Sherri
    on Tuesday, December 22, 2009 at 5:14 pm
  11. Dearest Kim, Sherri, and Carol,

    Thank you for being willing to share with us some of the most personal places of your heart. We sorrow with you, but not as those who grieve without hope.

    Your humble and faithful responses to the Lord's sovereign wisdom in your losses will yield fruit for years to come. I pray that you will experience the fruitfulness which Paul describes in 2 Corinthians 1:3-7:

    "Blessed be . . . the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God . . ."

    Dear sisters, you have my prayers as you walk through this Christmas season. I pray you will find joy, rather than sorrow, in the memories of past years with your loved ones and hope for the future as you focus on the miracle of the first Advent.
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Wednesday, December 23, 2009 at 11:55 am
  12. Dear Andrea,

    I pray you continue to experience the peace of mind and freedom from fear that only Christ can bring.

    "The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in You" Isaiah 26:3.

    May you have a joy-filled Christmas!
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Wednesday, December 23, 2009 at 11:57 am
  13. Jennifer,

    Thank you so much for sharing this beautiful testimony of God's faithfulness in your lives. We will be praying for His grace and abundant provisions to be poured out on your family.

    May you enjoy celebrating our glorious Savior's birth this week!
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Wednesday, December 23, 2009 at 11:59 am
  14. Dear Kay, Dawn, and Leslie S.,

    Thank you very much dear sisters for your kind words and also for the encouragement that you often give to so many who comment on this blog!

    May you and your families experience true joy and unity as you worship Him this Christmas season!
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Wednesday, December 23, 2009 at 12:03 pm

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