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Mary Kassian

Betty Boop Man-Training Kit

Posted on 02.05.10 by Mary Kassian
Topics: Womanhood

Attend any True Woman '10 Conference to hear more from Mary Kassian!
I had to kill a few hours while my remote car starter was being installed (hooray for that gift!), so I wandered over to a nearby Starbucks, which happened to be located in a bookstore. I don't go into bookstores as often as I used to. Usually I purchase my books online or download them on my Kindle. Whenever I do get the opportunity to go into a bookstore I browse around, trying to get a feel for the pulse of popular culture and trends and what women are reading and interested in. You can actually learn a lot from observing what kinds of books and items are featured in bookstores.Betty Boop

One of the displayed novelty items that caught my eye was a small box called "The Betty Boop Man-Training Kit." It contained a small collectible Gumby-type Betty Boop doll, about 2 inches tall, displayed behind a heart-shaped window. Betty Boop's kiss print was prominent on the front of the box.

There's nothing unusual about the idea that scantily clad Betty would use her seductive charm and kisses to "train" a man. The classic Betty Boop, and women throughout history, have used that tact. But the other message on the box was startling. With capital letters and an exclamation mark, Betty Boop's modern Man-Training Kit encouraged women to "WHIP HIM GOOD!" The innocent looking big-eyed Betty Boop doll sported a formidable black whip in her hand for that very purpose.

The back of the box advises:
"Is your man behaving more like ‘Man's Best Friend'? Teach your old dog new tricks with the help of a sexy, sweet, and sassy classic—Betty Boop! This kit includes a one-of-a-kind bendable Betty Boop figurine with whip in hand and a 32-page Betty-style man-training manual."
The training manual is filled with all sorts of exhortations to the reader about what Mr. Handsome ought to be doing for her—things like stroking her ego, respecting her opinions, knowing her shoe size, serving her breakfast in bed, respecting animals (?!), sending her flowers, massaging her feet, ensuring that he doesn't smell bad, taking her out, learning to cook, keeping an umbrella handy, opening doors for her. The final piece of advice is for girls to forever remember that "no man is entitled to your ‘Boop oop a doop!' He has to earn it!"

There's no doubt that this "Man-Training Kit" is meant to be cute and funny, but it contains a number of subtle, disturbing, underlying messages:
  1. Men are like animals.
  2. Women have a right to have men serve them.
  3. It's up to a woman to "train" her man to behave properly.
  4. A woman can control her man through sexuality and/or aggression.
  5. A woman can use a whip (punishment) to force her man to do what she wants.
  6. A woman should use sex as a reward and/or punishment.
What is particularly disturbing is that if roles were reversed so it were Bobby instead of Betty Boop—if Bobby were encouraged to "WHIP HER GOOD!; if Bobby called Betty his "old dog"; if Bobby had an attitude of entitlement and forcibly demanded that Betty serve and obey him; if Bobby had demands for Betty's behavior without any parameters for his own—we'd decry this novelty item as demeaning, abusive, oppressive, and horribly offensive. Bookstores wouldn't carry it.

Modern-day women are being encouraged to become the very thing that the feminists of the ‘60s condemned. Betty Boop's Man-Training Kit demonstrates that popular culture is cultivating a generation of women who feel superior and are demeaning, abusive, oppressive, and horribly offensive toward men.

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  1. Dear Mary,
    You sure have an amazing insight on BB & Bobbie Boop. My mom loved Betty Boop. And the avenger woman, I dream of Jeannie, Bewitched, Granny on the Beverly Hillbillies. & Gilligan's Island. My mom kept the house clean and cared & for and loved us four children. I'm glad she became a Christian before she died. And I'm glad I became a Christian in my twentys. Even though I'm a Christian I have much to relearn. Thanks for opening our eyes more.
    posted by Leslie.n
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 1:59 am
  2. Just a thought on:

    "Is your man behaving more like ‘Man's Best Friend'? Teach your old dog new tricks"

    when coupled with: "respecting animals (?!),"

    I thought I'd explain why the 'respecting animals' was found on that list (in case one might have been perplexed at how is this might be relevant in their list of what Mr. Handsome ought to be doing for her). The girl has a whip and then on the box they refer to men being like dogs and since if they behave as dogs they should be whipped. An animal activist might get angry and campaign against the product because if one took the suggestion full circle they could say it implied: 'People ought to 'whip' their dogs for misbehavior.' That is why they later state 'respecting animals' in their list so they might dodge the bullet of that kind of press/complaining (the people who created the product likely have a p.r. guy and or a lawyer). It WAS out of place on that list but they probably hoped it would appease the right people. So the folks out there who adore their pets wouldn't get offended with these sorts of conclusions (even though it is a stretch of a conclusion, the product creators probably felt they'd better smooth it over with a 'pet friendly' statement). Life is filled with litigations in north America and these folks weren't lacking that awareness.

    The product has bits about it that will probably annoy a lot of people, but this kind of 'off the cuff' humor is embraced today (as seen even in popular cartoons) seemingly by more than it offends. And most people wouldn't even notice it at all as it's rampant (this whole 'offend to amuse' phenomena).

    There is a doll they are selling in stores like 'tjmax', it looks like little red riding hood except more what she'd look like if she were a prostitute, really. It has a wolf with it that looks like it's longing to 'Know' her. The creature is literally leering at her. THAT product got my attention. How bizarre and unwholesome can one get? I think for those who haven't become dead to this litany of sin, we might simply close our eyes in a moment of sincere prayer. I'm not saying that I am not near dead, as there is so much out there it's at times difficult to keep the sense righteous outrage going.
    posted by j
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 3:15 am
  3. My attention was drawn mostly to the last paragraph..."women who feel superior and are demeaning, abusive, oppressive, and horribly offensive toward men." I would take that a step farther and say that when women become like this, it bleeds over in their relationships with women also. Ever have a co-worker or boss that acts that way? Women are becoming like beasts themselves when they reject God's way. It is sad. All the more reason for women who love God to become more like Him! Love living for Him!
    posted by Lynn
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 7:13 am
  4. I agree. I know what it's like to have that kind of attitude toward men. I had been abused and my mother had been abused and both of my grandfathers were not very good men. All the men in my life seemed to me to be awful and I was encouraged by both my grandmothers and my mother to never get married and just be your own woman.

    Thankfully, I am a rebel (in a good way). I waited until I was 25 years old, got married and now have two beautiful children. With the help of ROH and TW, I am fine tuning myself to get myself in line with what God intended me to be. The cycle of man bashing and abuse has stopped with me.

    Don't understand why God smiled on me and opened my eyes but I'm so glad that He did. He has rescued me from that prison and teaches me everyday to pray "Not my will but thine be done".
    posted by Jodi
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 7:52 am
  5. The timing of today's post is humorous to me. My husband is attending a work related seminar in, of all places, Las Vegas. He asked me to accompany him or he would have opted 'out'. We have sought out the wholesome as we stay here these few days. I see a town that uses women but the women are also using men. . . it is hedonism to the max. We came forwarned of what to avoid, what to not participate in, etc. Yes, scantily clad women are on billboards, taxis, lights, buildings, just about everywhere on Las Vegas Blvd. where our hotel is located.

    I've been praying for this city during our stay.

    We will spend this afternoon driving into the country to enjoy God's creation for a grounding.

    I pray for those who are believers who live here, for those who will become believers. . . their challenge is more obvious than mine in my home town.

    As Romans 1 reveals, when we deny God and worship the creation we move to such as the Betty Boop products and such. Our faith is timely in any time. . . man going after the will of the flesh is a downhill progression.

    Its a daily battle. The Betty Boop product could also open discussion with a non-believer or not-to-committed believer about how God values men and women, the joys and relationships He enables.

    He offers life, true life in all its fullness!
    posted by Denise
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 11:07 am
  6. Dear Mary:
    You're so right. If it was Bobby trying to whip a female into shape, etc., there would be such a public outcry. It would probably make the evening news. This is very sad. I know that feminists are not the enemy. I know they are deceived themselves by the enemy of our souls. I want to be more faithful in praying for them, that God would "open their eyes, so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in (God)"
    (Acts. 26:18)

    Thank you, Mary, ROH, and TW for your love for women and the burden of your heart to reach as many women as you can with the message of biblical
    womanhood, to expose the lies and heartache of feminism, to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with women so that they can experience "freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ."
    posted by Arlene
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 11:25 am
  7. Dear Mary,
    Thank-you for unpacking the messages that come with the Betty Boop doll. I have raised 2 girls and a son. The support for girls to excel in our culture is tremendous. My girls were frenetically busy and now as young adults are taking another look at their goals and relationships. They realize that God has more for them than a career.
    My son struggled to find his strengths. We prayed for him, and as a result of my husband and I discussing the situation, my husband began spending one evening a week with him--doing things that our son enjoyed. He is now an honor student and leader at his college.
    As parents we need to give guidance and encouragement to our boys. In the church we can pray for and encourage the teens and young men.
    posted by Carol Van Der Woude
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 11:48 am
  8. Lynn, I wholeheartedly agree with you when you said you were drawn to the last paragraph. Women of today, especially those raised during the "I am Woman-hear me roar era" are in our churches, managers on our jobs, supervisors, etc. My experience is they are usually more aggressive and have very bad attitudes toward men, even towards men trying to walk in their Godly roles. Our churches are riddled with women competing for roles God has ordained for men instead of just walking out the amazing role God has for us as women. Mary, thank you for perusing the bookstore. I actually liked Betty Boop, now I will have to be more cautious!!!
    posted by kathy baskin
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 12:27 pm
  9. That kind of attitude is all to prevalent in our society, through commercials, where the woman is always smart, and the men dumb, or in "need of training". It appals me. Even our little girls are being encouraged in this.
    posted by Velma Amundson
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 1:24 pm
  10. Awesome analysis, Mary! Thanks!
    posted by Heather
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 5:00 pm
  11. I have appreciated every post here, and learned something important from each of you. I echo the comments of others in being so thankful for ROH, TW and the writers on the blogs.
    Mary, you made me realize that to be a true woman we must see ourselves and our husbands through Biblical eyes. If we do, we all end up being respected, forgiven and served. I do love it when my husband serves me, but then,I love to serve him also! I do see my daughter in law with an edge of demandingness toward her husband (our son). I pray for her and I work harder at being a loving servant-to her and to my husband. As a 'demanding' woman my self, my hope is to model the opposite. God Bless you all.
    posted by Virginia Chapman
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 5:14 pm
  12. As a kid I used to watch the Betty Boop cartoons on t.v. and all the others. Cartoons were actually made for adults and shown along with the movie in theatres. Later when t.v. came along (in the 50's) they were Saturday morning fare. I thought Betty Boop was cute, but ditzy, but not sensual. Evidently, the 21st Century has tainted her as well.

    I would like to throw out something when it comes to "Christian" media. Can it really be called "Christian" if there is no clear Gospel presentation of the substitutionary death of Christ for our sins, and His Resurrection by faith alone. I bring this up because a couple of months ago I viewed a movie in a church that contained no gospel, but had a good moral to it, but implied good works for salvation. This DVD was sold in Christian book and media stores. It was an entertaining movie, but if there is no gospel, can a medium really be called Christian? What is the Biblical definition of a Christian? Is it possibly the antithesis of whom the culture considers a Christian is saved by morality and humanitarian works?
    saved by their morality.
    posted by Susan
    on Friday, February 5, 2010 at 9:33 pm
  13. Thank you so much for the insight. These words of truth need to be shouted out to this deaf world!
    posted by Lori Chyko
    on Saturday, February 6, 2010 at 6:33 am
  14. I thought the article by Mary was honest and insightful. However, some feminist behaviour is positive - some of the feminists are trying to promote rights for women. They are not necessarily negative actors in our lives.

    Although I believe very much in the Bible, my eyes have also been opened to the fact that feminists are not always against men.

    But more for the rights of women.

    This may be a provocative statement and it is not really meant to be.

    I believe that the Bible teaches us about respect for both sexes - including our own.
    posted by judy
    on Sunday, February 7, 2010 at 3:10 pm
  15. Dear Judy,

    Thanks for the comment and it's not a provocative statement at all. I think you've raised a legitimate observation.

    Several factors contributed to the various feminists movements within the history of our nation. Just research book topics which are as varied as a woman’s right to vote to her right to reinvent God, and you'll discover a few of these. No matter what issue rose to the forefront in the feminist struggle, at the root of each was a desire for more, a dissatisfaction and longing which women were experiencing and hoping to satisfy.

    Crucial issues have been raised by the feminist camp:

    * Inequality in the workforce: sexual harassment, prejudicial gender treatment, inequity in pay scales.

    * Pointing out the dualistic worldview that presents men as superior and women as inferior (which is unbiblical).

    * Oppression of women (especially of the third world, through crimes such as sex trafficking, victims of physical, sexual abuse and even genital mutilation).

    These are issues of criminal activity and social injustice that we can agree need a just solution.

    The Bible definitely teaches respect for both sexes -- and within Scripture lies the answer to the feminist's dilemma. Obviously, there are some individual feminists functioning with altruistic motives, believing they've found the solution to the problem of female "oppression."

    Biblically we can agree with the feminist view that women and men are of equal worth and value, and that all individuals should be treated with respect and dignity. And we can even agree that there is a problem that is the source of women's oppression and unhappiness -- but this is where we diverge.

    The biblical view is that the source of the problem lies within the heart of all mankind. We are all born in a sinful condition -- in need of redemption. Sinful men oppress women. Sinful women seek fulfillment for their emptiness through various means, but the only answer to true happiness and fulfillment lies in a relationship with Christ and living out His will for our lives.

    The feminist movement has its roots in the soil of liberalism which promotes the rights of the individual over all other institutions (which would include the traditional family unit). In the feminist wave of the 70's, women's role in the home, the institution of marriage, and the biblical view of morality, came under attack as the culprits for women's problems.

    In the 1971 "Declaration of Feminism" Gloria Steinam asserted that woman's greatest danger was "a husband or lover in the isolation of their own home."

    The feminist ideology is one that promotes the authority and liberty of the individual over the authority of God and Scripture. We can agree with the feminist assessment that there is a problem that needs to be addressed, but we have vastly different solutions.

    I encourage you to follow the link below to an excellent article which explains the history and impact of the feminist movement on our culture in a much more comprehensive and learned manner than I could ever hope to convey:

    http://www.profam.org/pub/rs/rs.2301.htm

    Thanks for your comment -- I always enjoy hearing from you!

    Blessings!
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Monday, February 8, 2010 at 1:13 pm
  16. Hallo Kimberly, I'm going to check that link out. I always read your mails (and those of the other women on here) because it is so refreshing.
    posted by judy
    on Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at 11:23 am
  17. Hi again Kimberley - and other ladies on this site. Yes, indeed, I just read the site. Very interesting stuff.

    It takes some reading and some chewing through.

    I particularly enjoyed the biblical model of marriage and the family and it is challenging to compare with the feminist views.

    What I have learned over the years (I live in Europe by the way) is that when a woman (or indeed man) does not live by God's laws, she (he) comes unstuck in some way or another and so do the family.

    And it sometimes takes years to sort it all out!
    posted by judy
    on Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at 12:15 pm
  18. Judy,

    I'm so glad you checked out the article and took the time to "chew through it" :-)

    I don't know how long you've been reading the articles here, so you may have missed a few things in our archives which address this same topic. You might want to check out an article I posted last year:

    http://www.truewoman.com/?id=680

    As well as articles listed under the "topics" section (to the right of the article) under the headings: Biblical Womanhood and Feminism.

    http://www.truewoman.com/?id=882&catId=2

    http://www.truewoman.com/?id=882&catId=4

    Hope this helps! So glad to have you joining us on this site!
    posted by Kimberly Wagner
    on Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at 1:47 pm
  19. Hi Kimberly, thank you for this and I hope the other ladies like it too.

    I have been on the site for nearly a month I think. I started getting interested when I read the book "Biblical Womanhood" by Nancy Leigh De Moss and one of the others on "Gratitude", both of which I enjoyed immensely. Her views are one of a kind and I for one think it is wonderful that someone stands up and says what she thinks. (And.....she is so right in what she says too).

    It is refreshing to be able to hear other women discuss their views on bible topics on this site and I read them all with great interest.

    (In fact :o) I watch the clock when I come home from work cos I know that a new blog will be on!!!)

    Love to all

    Judy
    posted by judy
    on Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at 2:32 pm
  20. Dear Judy,

    I've been veiwing this website (and listening to the program via mp3 player) for a just a little over a year now and it's been such a HUGE blessing in my life too (what an amazing year!)!! I'm so glad you found it where you are!... I also, wait eagerly for each days new blog *chuckles* so I get what you mean! When you put that there I just HAD to tell you, I KNOW that feeling. Welcome to the discussions sister. :c)

    Peace, love n' blessings all.
    posted by Jenny
    on Tuesday, February 9, 2010 at 4:23 pm
  21. Thank you Jenny - that is sweet of you.

    That message made me very happy! And I'm glad the site is blessing you.

    Look forward to reading any of your comments.


    Hugs to everyone on here!

    Judy
    posted by judy
    on Wednesday, February 10, 2010 at 8:06 am
  22. ...this makes me wonder. Is this why woman now days CAN'T get married? Watched part of a show called tough love and the woman were like this BB. Amazing! They had no control over their lives, and it was a wreak. They all wanted a man, but to their standards. I am so blessed to have a wonderful husband pick me out of all the would bes he could have had for a wife. I am the blessed one!

    Read a couple of months back on a bumper sticker in a store: The queen does not cook. I thought, "THIS queen does!" :o)
    posted by lisa
    on Monday, March 22, 2010 at 10:35 pm

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